Dear Joseph,

You are a big brother!

Your sister Margot is here. She arrived on Sunday, April 6, with her own story. But this is not the place for her story. This is yours.

I tell her about you in the night. I whisper to her about her brother. How he will always be a baby, because he isn’t here with us.

You aren’t here with us.

There was a moment during your sister’s labor when this settled into me with a heavy grief. I wanted to give birth to you again, give you another chance. I want both my babies, I wailed, and your mother and I wrapped our arms around each other and cried and cried.

She looks like you. There is a face she makes, after nursing, her little chin set back and her face completely relaxed. It’s remarkable, your grandpa says, how much she resembles your portrait. You look like siblings

Well, now we know the artist got something right.

She has beautiful dark hair like you. And your mouth.

Your mother takes a picture of her against my chest, your name on my necklace next to her face and mine, and my heart.

I miss you.

Mama

 

© Burning Eye

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5 thoughts on “Dear Joseph,

  1. jane says:

    wishing you all happiness, peace and delight in Margot , so glad you see Joseph in her – that is important !
    x

  2. Wishing you beautiful memories with Margot. May Joseph watch over the three of you. May she grow to know Joseph through you. Have a beautiful life Burning Eye…you have been so strong these long months, reward yourself by enjoying this beautiful baby, your second child.

  3. Congratulations! I’m so glad she arrived safely.
    I so understand wanting both of them. How wonderful, although perhaps at times difficult, that she looks like Joseph.

  4. Pinar says:

    Congratulations! Just wanted to also say how moved I am, and how deeply affected every time I read your poetry and writing..

  5. babylossmama says:

    So glad to hear. I’ve been watching and waiting and hoping for all good things for you.

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